Lessons From A Life Coach

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THE STYLE EDIT contributor Nicky Raby is a huge advocate of the portfolio career; she is a qualified life and business coach, writer and speaker. Nicky is passionate about supporting other women (and men!) to create a business and life that defines their version of success.

Nicky shares her advice and top tips for making 2018 your version of successful

The beginning of a new year can bring enormous excitement and hope, what will 2018 bring?

Purchasing a beautiful new notebook, calendar or diary to fill with your intentions, plans, goals (and best handwriting, of course!) can feel expansive and motivating.

We only have to have a quick scroll of our social media to find everyone else is doing it too; pre work gym sessions, multicoloured juices and hashtags that will support the gloomy days of January.

As a life coach, the first quarter of the year is always busy for me. I attract new and existing clients who are determined to make the upcoming year the one where they accelerate their life and business.

As part of my packages, I always send pre-work, I don’t work within a ‘one size fits all model’ and therefore I need to know what results my clients would like to gain.

This of course, helps me as the coach to remain effective and efficient with our time together but also it nudges my client into creating time and space in their life to consider what they want. Something we may in fact say we don’t have time for…

No doubt we could all come up with a shopping wish list; the perfect sized handbag, the winter coat that is warm and stylish and not too bulky and the shoes that will allow us to conquer all. However, I am interested in what you want for your life.

“I am interested in what you want for your life”

When we were of school age, a version of ‘success’ was sold to us… get good grades, meet a lovely partner, get a steady job that would grant a certain lifestyle. But what about the bits in between? Things you love doing? How you want to spend your time? How you want to feel? What or who gives you that spring in your step?

Often we can shrug these questions off – we are taught to be grateful for what we have. Perhaps the ‘dream life’ is only meant for celebrities or the lucky ones. I disagree, I believe you can have exactly what you want too. But you have to know what you want and what your version of success is.

A great tool you can use is a vision board. I am a very visual person and my collection of images, words and inspiration can be extremely helpful especially as it is strategically placed above my desktop, which seems to be the perfect height to greet my deep exhalation if I am stuck or overwhelmed.

Creating a vision board is completely personal. I’ve seen some which are perfectly branded and some that look like a supermarket notice board. There isn’t a correct way to do this. The only rule is you must connect with it and enjoy looking it at.

Here are five ways you can begin mapping out and creating your exciting 2018:

Reflect on 2017

What went really well? What did you love? What surprised you? What were your greatest moments? Where did you grow? Seek out the evidence. The photos, the complimentary emails from clients, perhaps physical memories from great experiences – pull it altogether. If you start with a positive mindset and focus on what you already have, you will bring that abundant mindset into the year ahead.

What do you want to be, do and have?

I love this exercise and frequently use it with my clients and always personally. Create three columns on a piece of paper or on your computer and add BE, DO and HAVE as the titles. Write down everything that springs to mind. Don’t edit. Don’t hold yourself back. Don’t focus on ‘how’. Simply move your ideas from your head onto the paper.

Get specific

Creating your own version of success is knowing what that means for you. When we write random statements such as ‘more me time’ or ‘earn more’ we can quickly move into overwhelm; our goal can seem like an impossible task. So break it down and brainstorm what the statement means to you. What does the scenario look like? How will you know you are doing it? Visualise the scene in your head and enjoy letting it play out in an ideal way.

Get arty

Pull together your images for your vision. Go through magazines, photographs, download images from Pinterest to print – be instinctive (of course you could just create a digital version, if that is more appealing). Keep your vision clear for your life… if going to the gym is not your favourite form of exercise don’t feel you have to stick a picture of a treadmill on your vision board because others do.

Keep adding to it and spend time looking at

It only has to be two minutes per day but in those two minutes try not to be distracted. Look closely at the images. Let your imagination run. Start by looking at the pictures but then see if you can connect with your other senses. The sound of the crashing waves, the feel of your brand new bed sheets, the smell of your favourite dish. Enjoy sitting with your images.

Finally don’t be afraid to change direction. If you add an image onto your vision board in January and then in March, it no longer feel relevant or appropriate, take it down/edit it. This is about creating your own unique vision for your life…listen to your intuition and your inner cheerleader and keep your eyes on the prize.

To find out more about Nicky, visit her website: www.nickyraby.com

Social media @nickyraby

To listen to Nicky’s podcast: www.nickyraby.com/podcast

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